Vuyiswa serves as a beacon of hope through a difficult journey
77-year-old Vuyiswa opened her home to her deceased friend’s grandchildren after their biological mother passed away. The journey has not been easy for her as an elderly person who is also sick and has no financial support. Despite the difficult struggles, she has remained hopeful and determined to provide the three children with a stable home where they can thrive and feel safe.
Background
“The children’s grandmother was my friend, so I am their family friend,” says Vuyiswa. The children’s maternal grandfather sold the family house when his wife, Vuyiswa’s friend, died, leaving their daughter, the children’s mother who was mentally ill and HIV positive, homeless and vulnerable. She had her first child as a result of rape. The mother fell pregnant again and had a second child. She kept moving and lived in different places with various men, leading her to fall pregnant again with her third and fourth child. She fell sick and sadly passed away, leaving her four children motherless and their fathers nowhere to be found. As a family friend, Vuyiswa could not leave the children alone living in a shack that was in bad condition. She took the children to her place as none of the family members came forward to assist after their mother’s death.
Systematic challenges
The children were not in good condition even when they lived with their mother. The youngest Nelisa was sick and did not receive child immunization treatment. The 8-year-old, Kholiswa, currently lives with her father, who took her in after the mother passed away. Vuyiswa lives with Niya, a 16-year-old girl whose father is in prison, Sanele, a 12-year-old boy whose father is around but does not support him, and Nelisa, a 5-year-old girl whose father’s whereabouts are unknown.
When their mother was sick, the children stopped attending school to care for her. Vuyiswa took the children to Child Welfare. “I wanted them to take the children, but I was told that most of the orphanages did not have the capacity to take in all the children,” she says. She managed to apply for foster grants for two children because they had birth certificates, but she could not apply for the grant for the 12-year-old because his birth certificate was lost, and she was not related to him. “I reported the situation to the schools they attended so they could return to school,” she adds. Vuyiswa supported the children alone, living off her pension grant of R2,180 ZAR per month. “I had to ask community members for help with clothes, food, and donations to take care of the children. It was extremely difficult for me,” she says. The children displayed trauma due to their previous stressful and traumatic environment and did not receive the growth stimulation every child needs to thrive.
The role of AFS-K and OCOF HHCSA intervention support
A community member introduced Vuyiswa to Irene Ledwaba, an AFS-K member, who then introduced her to Pauline from OCOF HHCSA36, who started assisting the family. “They helped me with the 12-year-old, who was having mental issues. As an elderly person, I did not understand why he was behaving the way he did, so I would get very frustrated”, said Vuyiswa. Pauline got a Social Worker who referred them to a Psychologist and Psychiatrist to assess the child. The boy was diagnosed with Post-traumatic Stress Disorder, Antisocial Personality Disorder, and Multiple Personality Disorder, which affected his behaviour and he started taking treatment. Vuyiswa was told to observe the child to ensure he was responding to the treatment. The 16-year-old girl also had challenges with her developmental milestones and struggled in school, so AFS-K is in the process of getting a suitable school. The youngest experienced developmental problems and had challenges with grasping information because she had never attended creche before.
The AFS-K network & OCOF HHCSA assisted Vuyiswa with psychosocial support, food parcels, clothing, and linked her with foster care grants for all the children, including the 12-year-old boy who did not have a birth certificate. Irene and Pauline have consistently checked on the family to ensure they are in good condition and that Vuyiswa and the children are thriving as best as they can. ” I am so thankful for Pauline and Irene, they have been my pillar of strength, and have helped me so much with the children.” She further adds that she is glad that she decided to take the children in because she knew things would get better in the end.
Where are they now
Sanele, the 12-year-old boy, has shown improved behaviour since starting treatment and has been recommended to attend a special school. The 16-year-old girl, Niya, is still in the process of getting a suitable school that caters to her challenges and 8-year-old Kholiswa gets to visit her siblings on weekends. All the children are undergoing assessments as advised by the clinic. Five-year-old Nelisa is not currently attending kindergarten but will go through a LEGO stimulation programme for developmental milestones to support her cognitive, emotional, and social development. AFS-K has started the development assessment baseline, and the next steps will be intervention and post-assessment. The family has come very far and is improving. Vuyiswa hopes to continue assisting the children and be around to see them grow up.
*All the names are changed to protect identity.